VoidMain

Last edit November 8, 2014
The CeePlusPlus standards say main() shall return an int. The construct "void main()" occupies an unregulated area between "vendor-specific extension" and "ill-formed".

I have extracted a list of the real reasons, by me (PhlIp) and a few others, why students should take int main more seriously:

void main ~~~. Use int main:

  • causes illiteracy in lab mice
  • inspires television networks to move reality shows to the next logical step: Human sacrifice
  • will transmit the contents of your internet cache folders to the nearest repressed fundamentalist priest
  • will precipitate the return of the Joe Isuzu commercials (1999/11/20)
  • causes destructive thread recidivism in technical newsgroups
  • will attract biker gangs to your granma's neighborhood
  • is a capitalist plot
  • convinces white supremacists to stay "in the closet" about their thing for Reggae music
  • nutates the precession of the equinoxes
  • has designs on your kid sister
  • makes killer bees think you smell like Chanel No. 5
  • will inspire mass media to get over this current cheerleader/gymnast thing
  • denies workers control over the means of production
  • relaxes the prohibitions against split infinitives (1999/04/24)
  • is caused by orbiting microwave platforms that target the thermal resonance signature of your neurons
  • makes Disney executives have vivid anxiety dreams about not litigating enough
  • makes folks >still< think alien beings make crop circles
  • uses NFL broadcasts without the expressed written consent of Fox Network
  • will make your loved ones think you have been possessed by aliens
  • will make you blind, grow hair on your palms, and convince you to vote Republican
  • increases the chances air traffic controllers accidentally cross flight corridors directly over your house
  • makes street lunatics think you are part of the conspiracy against them
  • points the Hubble Space Telescope at your house
  • makes IBM think they have a prayer of solving the Protein Folding Problem in less time than the Sun takes to burn out
  • makes George Lucas think we can tell the difference between any of his StarWars movies
  • makes your balls drop off
  • inspires a remote tribe in Borneo to carve big wooden statues that look just like you
  • causes Phlip's big toe to swell up like a balloon
  • inspires Hollywood executives to sign off on yet another insipid live-action remake of an insipid 1970s cartoon
  • has been cruely tested on charismatic dolphins and adorable baby seals
  • has already caused the return of Joe Isuzu, as I prophesied on this newsgroup last year (2001/04/04)
  • dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria

But see VoidMainIssues.
CategoryProgrammingLanguage CategoryLanguageImplementation